Birthday visit....

I am not sure that my mom makes the connection that I am her daughter. But I still wanted to spend time with her today. I needed to spend time with her today. I just wanted to sit with her.

I arrived to find a small birthday bag in her lap. I opened it to find a card and a gift. I immediately started to cry. I thought the staff had done that. The nurses knew my birthday was coming up. I read the card and it was exactly the type of card that she would have picked out. I opened the same gift to find a necklace with a mother and daughter in a heart. The tears would not stop. She would have picked that out. The staff informed me that it was my friends that had stopped in and set it up. They drove there this morning and dropped it off. They asked the nurse to give it to my mom before I arrived. I have never been so grateful for something. It was like they knew her when she was healthy and picked out exactly what she would have. I will cherish it forever. For my friends who did this: I love you so much and thank you just doesn't seem enough.

Soon after I stopped crying the tornado sirens went off. So, we moved all the residents at my mom's nursing home into the hall. Talk about hot and smelly. Wow! But my mom just sat there happy as can be. After all that was over, we went out into the common area and just sat together. She says to me " I love you. You are so sweet. You are the best." The whole time smiling. Even if she doesn't realize that I am her daughter, I know she is my mom and I just wanted to be there. I wanted to hear those few words she says to me. I think this birthday has been so hard because she doesn't really know the relationship between us, but she says I am her best friend. This year, she is in a nursing home. When you have dementia, a nursing home is usually the last step. You don't leave a nursing home when you have dementia except one way. I don't think about that. For now, I just sit with her...I listen and cherish those few words that she repeats over and over again...to me they are so sweet.